This Year, Make Resolutions that Stick
If you’re like many people, you may have plans for how you want this year to be different. Perhaps you envision eating more greens, starting a morning running routine, or finally pursuing your creative calling. January, for many, is a month of big dreams. The question is, how do you turn those plans into real, sustained change in your life?
Here are our top five tips for making behavior changes that stick:
Start simple.
There’s no need to go overboard with multiple goals (“This is the year I get in shape, find true love, and pay off my debt!”). You’ll get burned out quickly and just end up stressing yourself out. Instead, pick one thing that matters the most to you—not what you think you should be aiming for, but one that aligns with your deepest values and hopes for your future self. For example, not “I should stop eating sugar,” but “I want to be healthy and active as I age.”
James O. Prochaska, developer of the Transtheoretical Model of Change and author of Changing to Thrive, adds that “the more realistic the goals are (like losing one to two pounds per week), the more achievable they will be.” In addition, realistic goals are more motivating—success makes us want to continue!
Not sure where to begin? Take our Wellbeing Assessment to identify which area of your life might want the most attention right now.
Be specific.
You can only reach your goal if you have a clear sense of the finish line. So ask yourself, “What does wellbeing really look like to me?” Forming a concrete goal—such as meditate for 15 minutes each day—gives you a measurable outcome to track. With less specific goals, like reduce my stress, it’s harder to know if you’re really making progress.
Ready to start? Use our goal-setting activity to define your goal, break it down into achievable steps, and create a plan that works best for your life.
Get support (from others and yourself).
Nurture your relationshipsLetting a good friend or two in on your plan for change can build a support network that you can turn to for encouragement and accountability. “People are particularly prone to keeping quiet about their commitment...because they have tried and failed so many times in the past,” says Prochaska. “However, such silence only weakens their willpower.” On the other hand, he warns against relying too much on the support of others. In fact, “you need to be prepared to rely mostly on self-reinforcement or you may be disappointed by how little reinforcement you receive from others.”
When you’re ready to build your own support network, read up on the power of social support. Don’t forget that you are your number-one cheerleader, so it can also help to practice being good to yourself.
Set up your environment for success.
You’re much more likely to stick to your goals if you create an environment that turns them into habits. If you want to start biking to work, for example, park your bike so that it’s easier to access than your vehicle. Remove sugary snacks from your kitchen (or hide them in a tall cabinet) and set out bowls of fruit on the counter to reach for when you’re hungry. The idea is that you want to make it hard for yourself to slip up and fall back into old patterns.
Go a step further and make your home a relaxing place to be—the less stress you have in your personal environment, the more you can focus on achieving your wellbeing goals.
Go easy on yourself.
No matter how diligent you are, there’s no avoiding it— you are going to encounter setbacks. That’s normal, and not a problem. Turning around old habits and creating new routines is hard work, and the best way to keep your motivation up sometimes is just to shake your head, laugh, and try again tomorrow. Self-compassion is always more motivating than self-criticism.
For inspiration, watch Kristin Neff’s interview on self-compassion to learn how to be kinder to yourself when things get tough.
Remember: reaching a state of optimum wellbeing can sometimes be a long journey. Rather than rushing toward your end goal, focus your attention on the process itself.
“If you think about a specific problem that you have resolved, chances are you will recognize immediately
that its resolution didn’t happen all at once,” says Prochaska.
Rather, there are many steps along the way that become opportunities to celebrate progress and learn from challenges. So start slowly, pay attention, and keep going!
Prochaska, J.O., Prochaska, J. (2016). Changing to Thrive. Center City, MN: Hazelden Publishing.
Prochaska, J.O. (1994). Changing for Good. New York: Harper Collins.